“To hell with circumstances, I create opportunities.”
It was as though he had woken up one day and his world had completely changed. Aiden was single after a sixteen-year relationship that had ended. She had taken their dog with her and left his cat, at least, but the apartment was emptied of all her things. This was really all temporary, she had said. It was to be revisited in time and maybe they would get back together. Was that being let down easy?
He came back to the apartment because he was house sitting for his sister and she had returned from her trip. The cat food bag was ripped open and almost empty. Hartwick, a Maine coon cat, was a survivor. You know, all the things and questions that go through one’s mind at that point. Aiden was also feeling out of control…
Each of us has a story of a situation when we felt like Aiden did. Perhaps it is a mother having to say goodbye to her son who is on life support, from a motor vehicle crash, in the intensive care unit. The spark of hope was he had chosen to be an organ donor and 5 lives were going to be saved.
We always have a choice in our attitude in what or who we give the power or control. The following poem gives most of those choices.
Things You can Control
Your Beliefs
Your attitude
Your thoughts
Your perspective
How honest you are
Who your friends are
What books you read
How often you exercise
The type of food you eat
How many risks you take
How you interpret the situation
How kind you are to others
How kind you are to yourself
How often you say “I love you.”
How often you say “thank you.”
How you express your feelings
Whether or not you ask for help
How often you practice gratitude
How many times you smile today
The amount of effort you put forth
How you spend / invest your money
How much time you spend worrying
How often you think about your past
Whether or not you judge other people
Whether or not you try again after a setback
How much you appreciate the things you have
— Caleb LP Gunner
A wise mentor of mine said that it is okay to be on your pity pot, just don’t camp out there. Spiritually, it can be seen as a “dark night of the soul” that the mystic, St. John of the Cross, wrote about in a poem.1 The website referenced will give you more details if you are unfamiliar with it. “Darkness represents the hardships and difficulties the soul meets in detachment from the world and reaching the light of the union with the Creator.”2
“Metaphysical meaning of self-control (Unity’s Revealing Word) self-control–The capacity to direct one’s behavior in right ways. One who tries to establish self-control through will power and suppression never accomplishes permanent results. Self-control is accomplished when all the forces of man come in touch with the divine will and understanding.”
What I learned about ‘surrender’ in the Unity teachings, is that I am surrendering to God’s absolute good in my life. Divine Will is God wanting us to be happy. God wants the highest and best for us. Even when it doesn’t feel like it in the current moment, things will get better. The loving God that Jesus taught us about in the New Testament vs the shaming vengeful God that is read about in the Old Testament.
Let God and let go, trusting in God’s guidance that is given to us through our intuition. When the guidance is for the highest and best for all, it resonates in our being and it feels good in our heart.
So, the rest of the story for Aiden, whose name means trust, he went to a lake the next day and spent time with his sister and his two nieces. They were 4 and 6 years old. He taught them how to skip rocks on the water, like his dad had taught him. As he bent down to pick up a few flat rocks, He heard God say, “Welcome back!”
Feel free to share in the comments one of your experiences or you can use a different name like I have or whatever feels comfortable.
Rev Airin
1 https://www.ramdass.org/st-john-of-the-cross-and-dark-night-of-the-soul/
2 ibid.
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